For ISWMP
Lia Marques
Master Dog Behaviorist
The general purpose of guidelines is to give us more sense about what is going on and know that we are not alone going through something. They are more or less a road map that point us in the right direction. The 333 rule (or guideline) is no different. While every dog has their own schedule, the 3-3-3 Rule is a good general guideline as to how long it will take a dog to acclimate to a new home environment. In short, the first 3 days after a new dog comes home, they are likely to feel overwhelmed with all the changes and may be scared, so patience and setting them up for success are vital during this time. After about 3 weeks, the dog will start to settle into their new home. They will feel more comfortable, will get into a routine, and start to show their true personality. After 3 months, the dog should be settled into their routine and feel completely comfortable in his or her new home. They should be developing trust and gaining a sense of security with their new family.
Understanding how dogs experience arriving somewhere new, can help us welcome them in a way that makes sense to them. Making the experience one of relaxation instead of stress, creating a a positive association with the humans that are now the dog’s new pack, are the essence of the 333 rule.
Allowing your new dog to decompress for the first few days is one of the easiest and most helpful things you can do for them. Try seeing it from their point of view: they are arriving in a brand-new place, with brand new people and situations that they most likely haven’t experienced before. Think about how you feel when you first arrive in a foreign country where you don’t speak the language; it takes at least a few days before you can start to find your bearings. It helps if you have a place to anchor yourself to, so that becomes where you find safety. For a dog, arriving at your home means arriving at a foreign country, since they don’t speak our language. Providing them with a crate for comfort and security gives them that anchor – just like you feel when you are back at your hotel room. Guiding and teaching them where they will eat and where they will go potty is also extremely helpful.
Always remember that our relationship with our dogs is one of years and not weeks. It is helpful, once we have given them plenty of time to decompress, to start teaching them the rules of the game. Often, we take for granted that we were taught the social skills we have developed – with dogs it is no different. Try making a list of things that are important to you that your new companion does (or does not do) and work slowly in teaching them; small increments of time go a long way in the first few weeks since you are getting to know each other. It is best to do less and be successful than to reach for the stars and become frustrated. The more you teach, the stronger the relationship is going to become.
It takes human beings an average of 21 days to develop a new action into a habit. Think about starting your relationship with your dog in those terms. It takes 21 days for us to ingrain that we will stick to the diet, or keep going to the gym, or we will read more. Doing the same thing every day for 21 days “convinces” our brain that we now have a new routine. When working with dogs, the time frame is pretty much the same. We must work with them every day, for about 21 days, for any new action to become a habit, so once you start working on that list, don’t become discouraged if it seems you are not progressing fast enough. Relationships take time to build, and trust is something we earn. If you are having a hard time, speak with a professional or simply slow down and think of how you would like to be taught something new in a foreign language. My guess is with patience and compassion.
Once trust is established then practice is the name of the game. A dog’s cognitive abilities are (for lack of a better term) akin to that of a toddler. Think about that when deciding how much freedom to give your dog in the first few months; ask yourself “do I trust my dog to be left alone and not get into any mischief?” If the answer is no, work until you get to that point. For a dog, the important thing is to have direction. Trust and love will develop once they feel safe. The more you teach them what is important, the safer and calmer they will feel, and the more trust will develop. It’s a win, win.
